篇一：幼儿英语口语,圣诞节的英文小笑话
幼儿英语口语，圣诞节的英文小笑话
The thief and the judge
It was Christmas and the judge was in a benevolent mood as he questioned the prisoner. "What are you charged with?" he asked.
"Doing my christmas shopping early," replied the defendant.
"That's no offense," replied the judge, "How early were you doing this shopping?"
"Before the store opened," countered the prisoner.
法官与小偷
那天是圣诞节，法官在审讯犯人时也有点恻隐之心。“你为什么而被起诉？”他问。“采购圣诞节物品过早。”被告答。
“这不算犯法，”法官回答，“你购物多早？”
在商店开门之前，“犯人应道。
Jesus's Telly
A child on Christmas time asked for some paper and crayons in order to draw a crib. Eventually the artistic masterpiece was displayed for parental approval. The manager, the shepherds, Jesus and Holy Family wore duly admired."But what's that in the corner?" asked Mother.
"Oh, that's their telly," replied the tot.
耶稣的电视机
圣诞节时孩子要了纸和蜡笔，想画一张耶稣诞生像。最后这件艺术品被陈列出来供父母鉴赏。
他们对耶稣诞生后睡的马槽，牧羊人，耶稣及其家庭都逐一表示赞赏。
“可是那个角落里是什么？”妈妈问。
“噢，那是他们的电视机，”孩子回答说。
What does Santa Claus like to do in his garden?
Answer: he likes to hoe, hoe, hoe
圣诞老人喜欢在花园里做什么？
答案：锄地。（英文里Hoe 和ho同音。hoe是锄草之意，ho则是圣诞老人的笑声。）On Christmas Eve Santa Claus met an honest politician and a kind lawyer while riding up in an elevator of a very exclusive hotel. Just before the doors opened the three of them noticed a 1000NT bill lying on the floor. Which one of them do you think picked it up?
Answer: Santa of course! Why? Because everybody knows that the other two don’t exist!
圣诞节前夕，圣诞老人和一清廉的政治人物，以及一心地善良的律师在一家高级饭店一同等电梯，门还未开前，三人同时看到地上有一张新台币1000元的钞票，猜猜谁会将它捡起？
答案：当然是圣诞老人啦！为什么？因为大家都知道另外两者并不存在。
A dog runs through the snow during snowfall in Vienna, January 17, 2012.Ever wonder how dogs can walk barefoot in the snow? Now a Japanese scientist may have the answer -- an internal central heating system.
The secret lies in how dogs circulate their blood to prevent cold surfaces from chilling the rest of their bodies, according to Hiroyoshi Ninomiya, a professor at Yamazaki Gakuen University, just west of Tokyo.
The system uses warm, oxygenated blood to heat the cold blood that has been in contact with a cold surface before returning it to the dog's heart and central circulation.
"Dogs exchange heat at the end of their legs. Arterial blood flows to the end of their legs and then heats up venous blood before returning it to the heart," Ninomiya said of his findings, published in the journal Veterinary Dermatology.
"In other words, they have a heat exchange system in their feet."Ninomiya studied a preserved dog's leg under an electron microscope and found that because of the proximity of arteries and veins in the foot pad, the heat in the blood carried from the heart to the arteries is easily conducted to the cooler blood in the veins.
This heat transference maintains a constant temperature in the foot pad, even when exposed to extremely cold conditions.
Dogs are not alone in having this sort of heat exchange system, which is shared by other animals such as dolphins, Ninomiya said.
But not all dogs thrive in the cold, due to refining by breeders seeking specific traits, he added.
"Dogs evolved from wolves, and so they still have some of that ancestry remaining," he said.
"But that doesn't mean that one should always go and drag around in the snow all the time. There are many varieties of dogs nowadays that are not able to stand the cold."
篇二：经典英语小笑话带翻译
1、Be Careful What You Wish For
A couple had been married for 25 years and were celebrating their 60th birthdays, which fell on the same day.
During the celebration a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple for all 25 years, she would give them one wish each.
The wife wanted to travel around the world. The fairy waved her hand, and Boom! She had the tickets in her hand.
Next, it was the husband's turn. He paused for a moment, then said shyly, "Well, I'd like to have a woman 30 years younger than me."
The fairy picked up her wand, and Boom! He was ninety.
慎重许愿
一对结婚25周年的夫妻在庆祝他们六十岁的生日。他们恰好在同一天出生。
庆祝活动中，一位仙女出现了。她说，由于他们是已经结婚25年的恩爱夫妻，因此她给许给这对夫妻每个人一个愿望。
妻子想周游世界。仙女招了招手。“呯!”的一声，她的手中出现了一张票。
接下来该丈夫许愿了。他犹豫片刻，害羞地说，“那我想要一位比我年轻30岁的女人。”
仙女拾起了魔术棒。“呯!”，他变成了90岁。
2、All Right
Hurrying my 11-year old daughter to school, I made a right turn at a red light when it was prohibited. "Uh-oh," I said, realizing my mistake. "I just make an illegal turn."
"I guess it's all right." my daughter replied, "The police car behind us did the same thing."
没关系
我赶着开车将11岁的女儿送到学校去，在红灯处右拐了，而那是不允许的(译注:在一些国家如英国,其交通规则是车辆左行的,与我国相反)。“啊噢，”意识到犯了错误，我说。“我刚才拐弯是违章的。”
“我想那没关系的，”女儿回答说：“我们后面的警车也同样拐了弯。”
更多英语学习方法：企业英语培训
篇三：英文小笑话：A Monkey and a Flea
Mum: Baby, what’s the difference between a monkey and a flea? Baby: One is big and one is small.
Mum: Anything else?
Baby: A monkey can have fleas, but a flea can’t have monkeys.
妈妈：猴子和跳蚤有什么不同呢？
儿子：它们俩一大一小。
妈妈：还有呢？
儿子：猴子身上可以长跳蚤，而跳蚤身上却不能有猴子。 英文小笑话二则
英文小笑话：My Uncle
更多英语学习方法：企业英语培训
《英语口语小笑话》
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